From addictions to alcohol and drugs to a new life in the Spirit


A testimony of Adam St Laurent

I grew up in a broken home. There was no faith in my life. I didn’t even know a person that went to church. I had an absent alcoholic father and mother that worked 2 jobs. I remember being 9 and telling my friends what my father was going to do for me when I turned 10, but he never showed up. I was looking for love and found none. “Something must be wrong with me” I found myself alone and scared with no one to help guide me in life. I turned to drugs and alcohol at the age of 11 to numb the pain of being alone. I started to surround myself with tough dangerous people to make me feel safe. By the time I’m 17 I found myself using and selling heroin. Was gang affiliated. I’d been stabbed and convicted of felony assault with a deadly weapon. Sentenced to 5 years in prison. I kept a loaded gun underneath my truck seat. I had zero regard for human life. I had sold my soul to the enemy. I was told the lie “I could be a powerful god”, but became a hopeless slave. I was shackled to my sins. To my guilt. To my shame. For many years I carried that yoke of iron. It was heavy, uncomfortable , un yielding. My only solution was more alcohol and more drugs. The thing is I didn’t need a solution. I needed salvation

I found myself in a life of complete darkness and pain. A life of complete despair. Then my sister reached out to me. She asked me to go to an AA meeting for her. I couldn’t do it for myself. My guilt from my wrongs. And my shame of “I am wrong” was too much to face. At least to face by myself. I found in aa people like me. People that were sick as I am. People that also did terrible things but now had found reprieve. Found a life where they didn’t need to use alcohol. One day at a time. They helped me learn how to live life without drugs and alcohol. They helped me clean up many of my wrongs. Make amends to many people. But I found myself with one emends they couldn’t help me with. That was with “our father”. See I still carried that iron yoke. 



I still feared death. That’s when God lead me here to San Damiano mission. Through an aa meeting. I began to be introduced to Christ. First though Wendy’s smile. Then Justine’s voice. Then I heard His word through father Cristiano in a way I could understand. I gained brothers and sisters like Allan, Barbara and all the parishioners. I learned about the faith and the church from my god mother Carolyn. I realized I had so many people helping me carry my cross. I began to fall in love with Jesus through this family.  And last easter I repented and was baptized. The old Adam died that day. And a new one was born. Born Free from those sins. Free from guilt and shame. Today I walk in union with Jesus. I grow in understanding of our father through him. I’m being filled more and more every day with the Holy Spirit. My wounded heart is being healed. My disordered beliefs are being reordered into a holy order. I still fall a lot. And he is always there to lift me back up. He never looks at me with judgment but with love. The love I yearned for all my life.  I am extremely grateful for that has happened in my life.  I have a great understanding of what I’ve been saved from. I know a living hell far from God.  I understand God never sent me to hell. I did. But he did send His son to come get me. To save me. God allows bad things to happen. Because he knows greater things will come from it. And now that I’ve been saved. I pray I may be an instrument to help save others. 


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